Thursday, August 21, 2008

I'm still here, sort of

Well, that month went to hell fast. I keep wanting to post, but thinking I need to have photos, and my camera and I are never in the same place at the same time. Perhaps this will not be a photo heavy blog for a while.

I've been busy as anything, and doing the avoidance dance as well. I'll be honest, things have not been ducky at my house lately. Money is tight (read nonexistant), bill collectors are calling, my daughter got a new job, new car, my husband got a new truck (really, it was an amazing deal, and will save us money in the long run, mostly in fuel costs), hubby and I haven't been communicating about ANYTHING because neither has wanted to upset the other.....and the list goes on.

When I am upset, I get very turtle like. I withdraw, don't write, don't take care of myself, my house, I just try to hide as much as possible. And the more I hide, the worse the depression gets, because I feel so alone. And so I hide more. See the problem here?

I'm not saying things are miraculously better. Most things still suck. But last weekend Brad and I ran away from home for a couple of days. And talked. And cried. And talked some more. And suddenly, I remember why I love him so much, and how the two of us can get through anything, as long as we are together. Side by side, that's how we get through life. And that's how we will get through the current insanity.

On a happier note, the animals are doing fabulous. The puppy's name is Keon (it's Irish, means young warrior), and he has settled in like an old pro. We are having so much fun with him, and his sweet little personality. He's the happiest damn dog at 5 am I've every seen. Penny and Bast have become best buddies, so much so that I think I got Penny a cat, not myself! LOL Bast sleeps with Penny, and wars with Keon. And yells at me when her food bowl is empty!

I have an amazing life, I've just forgotten that in all the drama that comes with adulthood and bills. And I've avoided everything, including this blog, which is supposed to help me stay a little saner. So, I'm back, starting fresh. Perhaps even someday with pictures!


Catherine said...

I continue to be amazed at how much work it is being an adult. I'm 51, and some days I just wish my mom would say, "Ha, just kidding. Move back home and I'll take care of you!"

She did much to prepare me for the world, but she didn't tell me being an adult would be so hard, and that it wouldn't ever really get easier.

It's a heck of a rollercoaster, that's for sure. I guess all we can do is hang on and enjoy the ride.

Kat said...

Thanks Catherine. Intellectually, I think we all know that everyone goes through the same thing. But it sure does help when someone else says they are facing the same challenges!
I'm trying harder to enjoy the ride, and worrying less about the car going off the rails. Oh, isn't that a joyful mental image! (weak grin)